Something about Nothing

Onge tries to makes sense of her life and seeks the knowledge to fathom what it's all about.

Sunday, August 20, 2006

For the Sake of it

You know sometimes when you meet a bloke at a club and you kind of fancy him but only because there was no other talent in sight? Well, that recently happened to me. This guy was checking me out while I was chatting to my mate. I didn't take any notice of him. A little later, he made the approach and asked me why I'm not dancing. I came up with the lame excuse that I had a dodgy leg. He must have taken that as a dismissal as he swiftly retreated back to his party.

My friend and I went to other rooms in the crowded, sweaty club but there was nothing to write home about. The guys were dry, and I was beginning to wonder what I was doing there. It was my mate's idea to go but I knew as soon as I set my foot into the place that it wasn't my scene. Call me a snob, but there was a distinct lack of sophistication in both the club and the clientele. Anyway, I perservered and I tried to chill but I wasn't feeling the vibe in the club.

But later on in the evening, the same guy who attempted my to chat me up re-appeared. We made eye contact and then we started chatting. Soon he made a move on me which I really wasn't sure about because I couldn't decided whether or not I fancied him. He was well over 6ft, slim, and had very little hair. Ok, he seemed to be losing his hair and decided to shave it off. I don't know if I like a guy without hair and he wasn't persuading me to try one now. But I soon gave in to his advances and we kissed. He had the weirdest kissing action that I have ever come across; his tongue was like a pneumatic drill going in and out of my mouth at a furious pace. I thought 'where's the fire?'. Then he said that he has a fantasy of being with a girl like me, referring to my ethnicity. What do you make of that? I was sort of flattered and a bit scared at the same time.

We exchanged numbers with a bit of intrepidation on my part, but I thought he could be someone I would like to get to know but there was no romance. This finally dawned on me when I ignored his phone calls. I texted back apologising for missing his calls. He then said he'll contact me later in the week so that we could organise something. I said that would look forward to his call. To my relief, he never called. Guys seem to quickly realise when a girl is not into him. But why does it take so long for girls to figure it out?

Sunday, August 13, 2006

What are they thinking?

I went out the other night to a bar with my best mate. I always thought that if any males approach us, then they wouldn't go to my mate. Not because she looks like a moose but because she wears an engagement ring. When guys come up to us I thought it was my shyness that sends out the wrong message i.e. leave me alone. But now I have come to the conclusion that men like a challenge and if they see a woman they fancy wearing a ring (engagement or wedding ring) they will try their luck to see how far they can get.

What chance has the singleton have now when men are more attracted to the woman who has already got a man? Life is hard enough living in London where there seems to be more women than men. A lot of potential men that I have come across through work, a bar or a club, all seem to be taken. So I wonder if I should go down the route of getting a mate who is already hooked up - not married of course. I don't know what to do. Am I doomed to singledom for the rest of my natural?

Thursday, August 10, 2006

Can you hear me mother?

Hi again

As you probably have noticed, I'm not very good with this high-tech and it seems that no one wishes to comment on my last post. Maybe no one has anything to say or perhaps no one has actually seen it! I have been doing my utmost to make my blog visible but having to copy and paste stuff on to my template and positioning right is turning out to be a little more complicated that what I expected.

Anyway, if I'm talking to myself then so be it. I will plough on until I have go this blogging thing licked.

In the meantime, if there is anyone who can advise me on how to fathom the British 30-something male, then all comments will be greatly appreciated.


Wednesday, August 09, 2006

Complex simpletons

A couple of months ago, I met a guy at a bar who was a friend of a friend. We got on really well. So much so, that at the end of our initial meeting, he planted a long lingering kiss on my unsuspecting lips. For about a month after that we met up for drinks and had some really good times together with some nice snogs, but without the recklessness of jumping into bed.

However, things began to go sour when he started thinking about what was happening to us. A month into our 'relationship' he concluded in a round-about way that I wasn't willing to see him for more than once a week and that I am guarded. Now, is it me or isn't it wise to show some interest in a man without the need of ripping his clothes off and declaring undying love for him? He moaned that I didn't open up about myself and that I should have more stories to tell him. What am I, a Jackanory presenter? Gone are the days of being yourself. Now you have to bloody entertain a potential mate. I'm not saying that I didn't talk about myself and had no anecdotes to disclose, but telling, what is really, a stranger about your inner most feelings and thoughts, after having a couple of dates is not only dangerous, but downright irresponsible. Suppose he turned out to be some kind of nutter?

I'm the kind of gal who is admittedly a bit of a slow burner, but once I get to know a guy then I can be as loving and as loyal a person you could ever wish for. We are both in our early 30s. But here's the thing. Is my 'ex' right in saying I should have opened up more, or was I right for taking each date as it comes and seeing how things go between us without revealing all (in all its literal sense)?